This was published 7 years ago
Things that will surprise you on board the world's biggest ship Harmony of the Seas
You need a bit of intestinal fortitude to stomach the new Ultimate Abyss ride on the Harmony of the Seas. Not just because this slide stands at 45.72 metres above sea level and propels riders down a twisted cylinder to the ship's Board Walk 10 decks below, but because the twin pairs of tubes look like crazy misshapen purple human organs – large intestines if you will.
I don't have the 'guts' for it; I'm a wimp. At one stage I thought I'd have a go but that idea soon evaporated when I hear the blood-curdling screams coming from inside the tubes. Some love it and others are in shock, like my New Zealand pal who can't even speak after she emerges from her 10 seconds of hurtling through a black void at break-neck speed.
Ultimate Abyss is positioned high above the aft of the ship; at the other end (the bow), there's the Perform Storm – three cylindrical water slides two of which loop over each other, and each depositing its rider into a watery dish. If you like slides – wet or of the gigantic slippery dip variety – you'll be in heaven.
I have a ride on the merry-go-round (three in fact!); when you see a carousel on a cruise ship you just have to climb aboard a painted pony.
See also: Twenty amazing cruises for first-timers
Harmony of the Seas offers all the fun of the fair, like a giant Royal Easter Show on steroids cut adrift in a vast ocean. It's the biggest cruise ship in the world, but at 362 metres long it only pips its gargantuan 'little sister' Allure of the Seas by a mere 30.5 centimetres and is 76.2 centimetres wider and just a few tonnes heavier. Amazingly this 18 deck city, that can carry a total of 6780 passengers and 2100 crew at full capacity, is on automatic pilot for 99.99 per cent of the time, according to Captain Gus Andersson.
As I stand on the biggest bridge I've ever visited on more than 60 ships, I'm not sure if I'm comforted to know that no-one is actually 'driving it'; there are however always two navigational officers and one quartermaster always on duty and a host of digital equipment. There's also an officer peering at the horizon through binoculars. We move to the portside bridge wing where Captain Andersson shows us the gadgets that move the bow-thrusters and a tiny little button that's the ship's horn. One visitor is dying to press it and the Captain gives him the nod! Yes, it's a big, fun theme park.
Despite the huge size and all the mind-boggling stats about tonnes, horsepower and of course the $US1.5 billion ($A2 billion) price-tag, Royal Caribbean stresses that size doesn't really matter – it's all about the ability to give guests amazing experiences and for that you have to have a lot of space.
Harmony is said to be a fusion of the best and most popular elements of the Oasis class of ships (to which it belongs) and the Quantum class (which are a tad smaller and to which Ovation of the Seas (which comes to Australia in December) belongs. A "love child" of the two classes, as a staffer quips to me.
See also: How to cruise like you're at a high-end hotel
Among these experiences is the quirky Wonderland restaurant on Deck 12, an imaginative take on the Alice theme. You enter this speciality restaurant as if travelling down a rabbit hole to be greeted by waiters in cerise velvet uniforms and sit down to tables decorated with glassware, cutlery and a paintbrush. The latter is used to swish over your blank parchment menu, whereupon the actual menu will appear, which changes at the whim of the chef. They wouldn't give me a copy, nor is there one on the website – it's a secret and along with other speciality restaurants, such as 'Jamie's Italian', it has a surcharge ($US49). It looks like fun although with just two days and nights on board I didn't get to sample its wares.
There are countless restaurants and bars on Harmony, either lining the open air space called Central Park (my favourite neighbourhood) – such as the steak house Chops Grille and Jamie Oliver's eatery – or lining the Boardwalk, such as Johnny Rocket's burger joint and the Sabor's Mexican cantina, along with the three storey main dining room, where each level has its own name and theme but serves the same food.
Kids clubs are huge and teen hangouts - the Living Room and Fuel - are hip to the groove; little ones have their own twisty purple slide and big dunking buckets to cool them down.
I had two days afloat; you'll need at least a week to go zip lining over Central Park, hang ten at the FlowRider surf simulator, get in an order at the Bionic Bar where two robots shake up your cocktails (apparently Sex on the Beach is a popular request) to the latest funky tunes, dance at the Attic nightclub and literally walk thousands and thousands of steps from cabin (or suite if you have around $12,000 a person to spend on one of the funky two level loft suites for a week at sea) to elevator. A big ship can mean long waiting time at the lifts (walk down if you can) and a tough time getting a seat at the high-diving and aerial acrobatic shows at the Aqua Theatre. However, although I was one of 4000 guests and some 2500 crew, I have to say it didn't feel like a squeeze at all. It was fun, even for wimps like me. But my feet were killing me!
Caroline Gladstone travelled as a guest of Royal Caribbean International.
See also: Australia's new, billion-dollar cruise giant is ready
See also: World's 10 biggest cruise ships
Sign up for the Traveller Deals newsletter
Get exclusive travel deals delivered straight to your inbox. Sign up now.