Hedonistic allure ... New Caledonia's whtie beaches and azure water.
The French flag flies over this capital city but Sam Vincent finds a cosmopolitan heartbeat.
I'd been told Noumea looks like Nice: bronzed bodies, palm-lined beaches, yacht-choked harbours, designer dogs and lazy evening games of petanque. Only last time I was in Nice, flying fox didn't feature on the menu du jour.
The French tricolour may fly above New Caledonia's capital but the city is a long way from la Metropole. It is a fusion of European sophistication and indigenous Kanak culture, all the while incorporating the heady influences of recent arrivals from Asia and Polynesia. Sometime after 2013, New Caledonians of all races will determine the political future of their territory in a much-anticipated referendum on self-determination.
7.30am
Nowhere is Noumea's multiculturalism more evident than at the city's morning market, clustered around the Port Moselle Marina, a short walk from the city centre.
Here, portly Kanak women dressed in loud Mother Hubbard dresses attend stalls brimming with yams, taro and manioc, while beside them toothless Chinese men suck on fresh honeycomb and the prim French boulanger serves buttery croissants straight from the oven. Buy a few of her bakery treats and tropical fruit before heading to the market's cafe for an espresso. Stock up on picnic supplies before leaving the market.
Noumea market, Port Moselle Marina, open daily 5am-11am.
9am
Like Australia, New Caledonia's first colonists didn't come of their own volition. Between 1864 and 1897, more than 30,000 French convicts were sent to the outpost in what one governor infamously called ''the tap of dirty water''. Now their descendants represent the bulk of New Caledonia's European population (known as ''Caldoches'') and it has only been in the past decade that the shame associated with the convict period has been lifted.
Catch a taxi 10 minutes from the city to the Nouville Peninsula to see the site of the former penitentiary, now housing a university, a language school and a theatre. These elegant sandstone buildings are considered New Caledonia's best-preserved examples of colonial architecture. The penitentiary's former bakery is being converted into a convict museum, to open mid-2011.
Nouville Peninsula, Avenue James Cook. Heritage guide Alain Fort leads tours of the penitentiary for 1500 French Pacific francs ($28), phone +687 264 813, see www.office-tourisme.nc.
10am
It's not Les Halles but Noumea's shopping district is home to boutiques selling French designer labels at reasonable prices. North of the city centre, visit Rue de Sebastopol, Rue Georges Clemenceau, Rue de l'Alma and Rue Jean Jaures for duty-free French lingerie, perfume, shoes and handbags.
Tricot Raye, on 27 Rue de l'Alma, sells designer clothing and the shop's eponymous brand. Phone +687 254 021, see www.tricot-raye.com.
Noon
Unwrap your market loot for a picnic under the flame trees in Place des Cocotiers, Noumea's central city square. This 19th-century park is a tranquil refuge for playing children, their stressed parents and office workers in need of a siesta. There are lush lawns, a pretty rotunda and a giant chessboard where teenagers hold break-dancing competitions.
On Thursday evenings the square throbs with ''Jeudis du Centre Ville'' (Thursdays in the city centre), a themed street market.
Jeudis du Centre Ville is held every Thursday from 6pm until late.
1pm
In 1988, New Caledonia emerged from a four-year quasi civil war, essentially between Kanaks wanting independence and Caldoches loyal to French rule. As an olive branch to the Kanak community, French president Francois Mitterrand announced the last of the ''Grand Projects'', a series of cultural monuments commissioned during his presidency, would be dedicated to Kanak culture.
Named after a late independence leader, the Jean-Marie Tjibaou Cultural Centre opened in 1998 and is one of the finest examples of modern architecture in Oceania.
It holds the world's largest collection of Pacific art and fascinating exhibitions on Kanak culture but the real star is the building itself, designed by Italian Renzo Piano, the mastermind behind the Centre Pompidou in Paris.
Leave at least an hour to wander around the building's outskirts and marvel at how effortlessly such a striking structure blends into the surrounding mangrove swamps.
Some say the cultural centre looks like a series of termite mounds or yacht sails; Piano was trying to evoke the form of traditional Kanak huts called ''cases''.
Jean-Marie Tjibaou Cultural Centre, Rue des accords de Matignon, open Tuesday-Sunday, 9am-5pm, entry 500 French Pacific francs, see www.adck.nc.
3pm
Time for some hedonism. Noumea's lagoon is dotted with tiny islets know in French as ''ilots''. Surrounded by white beaches and azure waters teeming with fish, they are perfect for an afternoon of sunbaking, swimming and snorkelling. Catch a taxi-boat from Baie de l'Anse Vata to Ilot Maitre, five kilometres offshore.
Don't be alarmed by the many sea snakes - they're harmless.
Plages Loisirs, 110 Promenade Roger Laroque, shuttles passengers between Anse Vata Bay and Ilot Maitre for 2400 French Pacific francs a person return. Phone +687 261 780, see www.plagesloisirs.nc.
5.30pm
Back on the mainland, walk north along Promenade Roger Laroque to Baie des Citrons, known colloquially as ''Baie des nichons'' (boob bay) for the propensity of recently arrived Parisian women to sunbake topless.
Overlooking the bay is a ritzy strip of bars and restaurants where Noumeans meet for a sundowner. Join them at Les 3 Brasseurs for ''un pint'' of locally brewed Number One beer.
For a more typically Melanesian experience, a coconut shell of kava is a great way to relax after a busy day. Introduced from Vanuatu in the 1980s, this mild sedative looks (and some would argue tastes) like dirty dishwater.
Originally consumed by working-class Kanaks at knock-off time, kava is now popular with all sections of New Caledonian society. There are more than 200 kava bars or ''nakamals'' in Noumea and one of the best is Le Ta, three blocks north of Place des Cocotiers.
Les 3 Brasseurs, Centre Commercial Baie des Citrons, +687 260 866. A pint of Number One costs 700 French Pacific francs. Le Ta, corner rues Georges Clemenceau and Paul Doumer. A shell of kava costs about 150 French Pacific francs.
7pm
If the Kanak delicacy of flying fox doesn't take your fancy (and it shouldn't, they're now endangered), catch a taxi to La Chaumiere in the city's Latin Quarter for fine Gallic gastronomy using Caledonian and French ingredients.
There's a set dinner menu for 2800 French Pacific francs, with rustic dishes such as wild rabbit confit, foie gras, venison steak and lamb knuckles. The lack of Australian and New Zealand tipple on the wine list is an insight into the mindset of some European New Caledonians; it's as if Bordeaux were an hour's train ride away on the TGV, not 17,000 kilometres across the ocean.
La Chaumiere, 13 Rue du Dr Guegan, +687 272 462.
Air Caledonie (Aircalin) has a fare from Sydney for about $730 (2hr 50min). Melbourne passengers pay about $750 and fly Qantas to Sydney to connect. Qantas and Air Austral also have fares from Sydney. Fares are low-season return including tax. Ramada Plaza has suites overlooking Anse Vata Bay from 16,900 French Pacific francs. See www.ramadaplaza-noumea.nc.
Sign up for the Traveller Deals newsletter
Get exclusive travel deals delivered straight to your inbox. Sign up now.