This was published 13 years ago
Bulls Cruisers, Paynesville review: Awash with satisfaction
Kate Nancarrow gets on board for a nautical break on the Gippsland Lakes.
Fitting in ... the 10-berth cruiser, the Una..
We're offshore from the Metung pub doing circle work in the good ship Una, a 10-berth cruiser we've hired for three days. Minutes are passing and a counter meal and glass of wine seem tantalisingly close but it's all too obvious we have no idea how to park the Una.
Around and around we go, like P-plate drivers trying to avoid the challenge of their first parallel park at peak hour. There are lots of boats moored at the public jetties outside the pub, including two others hired, like ours, from Bulls Cruisers in Paynesville.
Our fellow hirers have clearly taken in more of the briefing from the company's friendly staff. Or they've done it before. Or both. We can see a large group of blokes sitting atop their Bulls cruiser sipping stubbies; they look relaxed.
We neither look nor feel relaxed. We're three city adults and four children on the second night of a three-night jaunt around the Gippsland Lakes.
Our first night was low-stress, spent moored outside Bulls' Paynesville headquarters. We did nothing more than try on the complimentary Bulls caps (a nice touch) and explore the Una.
On a boat not quite 12 metres long and barely five metres wide - albeit with two levels - that doesn't take long. Working out the maths of the three cabins, one with a double bed tucked downstairs beneath the bow and the other two flanking the central walkway, is a bit trickier but there is enough room for seven people without converting the dining table seating to a double bed.
The cabins are small and comfortable enough, each with an opening window and a few shelves and cupboards for gear. The room with bunk beds seems oppressively squeezy to me but two 11-year-old boys love it.
The shower is a small cubicle inside and the toilet opens from the rear deck.
If it all sounds a bit like a camper van on water, that's because it is, except with the bonus of an upstairs deck with a table, plenty of seating and a shade canopy. Downstairs, a well-equipped kitchen with fridge, stove and plenty of equipment means dinners and cups of tea are easy.
The next morning we listen as Bulls' Gavin Crellin cheerfully, patiently and repeatedly explains the complexities of starting, driving, navigating and mooring the Una. He goes through which combination of switches and dials controlled the lights, depth sounder, battery charger and top-deck steering. He even praises us for being good listeners.
If only Gavin could see us now - 60 metres out from the Metung pub, frozen with confusion by half-remembered mooring instructions.
We'd had a go at pulling into a quiet jetty earlier in the day but it seemed much harder than the trial run we'd had with Gav so we just ran aground on a sandy shore and reversed off.
But that won't work at the Metung pub: here we have to manoeuvre between other expensive watercraft and the jetties. Still, it's got to be done and it's my turn to have a go.
I inch closer. Gavin's instructions are now a blur: Slow forward, turn the wheel, reverse, something, something. We've gone too close to back out but, as I get closer, a breeze whooshes up. Una's back whips around, swinging towards another very expensive-looking cruiser. Aaargh.
Before we can panic or crash, we hear a thumping of feet and the pile of beaut blokes who'd been watching this tragic mix of action and inaction from their Bulls' cruiser have leapt onto the jetty, grabbed our ropes and dragged Una to safety.
"Thank you so much. That's brilliant," I gush.
"We couldn't have done it without you."
"You won't be thanking us at 3am when we're all still on it," comes the cheery reply as our good Samaritans head back to their stubbies.
As it turns out, they call it a night before 2am and we all sleep soundly, helped by Una's gentle rocking.
Next morning, we flee to the open waters, guided part of the way by a pod of dolphins.
All the kids have a turn at the wheel and we feel like old sea dogs, perched on Una's top deck, maps and charts in hand. We point Una towards Ocean Grange - a tiny settlement on the backwaters of Lake Victoria that has Bass Strait just over the sand dune.
Getting there involves navigating a very narrow, shallow passage of water, so the depth sounder goes off frequently and loudly. Trying to understand which side of the many and varied marine markers we are supposed to be on is tricky but as Gavin had said Bulls was only a phone call away if disaster struck, we persist.
And how worth it Ocean Grange is. Kids leap in and out of the water from the Una and run up and down sandhills. Adults prepare a decktop barbecue and a glass of wine or two while the sun sets over the lakes and hundreds of pelicans settle on a central island for the night.
The next morning, we return to Paynesville where Gav is waiting ready to grab us before we smash into their jetty. In three days, we never mastered much more than forward, reverse and tea and toast but it turned out we didn't need to.
VISITORS' BOOK
Bulls Cruisers
Address 54 Slip Road, Paynesville, 5156 1200.
Bookings Bulls has a fleet of two- to 11-berth cruisers, ranging in price from $824-$1492 for a minimum two-night hire between May and September. More on long weekends and in summer.
Verdict 18. Enormous fun, even for rank amateurs.
The score: 19-20 excellent; 17-18 great; 15-16 good; 13-14 comfortable.
All weekends away are conducted anonymously and paid for by Traveller.
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