Postcard from Pondicherry.Credit: AFP
A man sitting on the pavement in India is hardly worth a second glance. Even when he is shuffling cards and having a heart-to-heart with something inside a small box next to him. Our tour guides, Ramesh and Raj, aren't surprised by three other men further along Rue Mahe de Labourdonnais in Pondicherry (a crumbling relic of France's colonial past in southern India), all deep in conversation with the inmates inside the makeshift birdcages.
It turns out they are all fortune tellers chatting away to their parrots, which are as integral to their brand of futurology as a crystal ball, tea leaves or tarot cards.
Indians can be a deeply superstitious lot, relying on astrological charts to determine whom to marry and when, as well as what day to shave (not Monday) and wash your hair (not Thursday). The Sri Aurobindo Ashram in Pondicherry is one of the wealthiest in India, catering mainly to French tourists in need of some karmic readjusting.
My saasthiri (or soothsayer) agrees to prognosticate with the assistance of his feathered friend for a very reasonable 10 rupee (about 25 cents).
After asking my name, he pulls out a deck of cards and begins chanting in Tamil (it may be his shopping list for all I know) while the bird shuffles the cards.
It eventually selects one, which it drags away with its tiny beak. It's the Mother of Jesus, the fortune teller says cryptically, given the Bible never mentions Mary's career as a Bollywood dancer.
He then embarks on a lengthy explanation of my past, present and future that Ramesh summarises as “a verrrry good card. You will have prrrrosperity”.
Raj elaborates: “You have faced many hurdles in your life. Many hurdles that didn't allow you to achieve what you want. But do not worry. All will be good from now on.”
As pep talks go, it's a bargain and inspires my fellow traveller, Keith, to surrender 10 rupee to the fortune teller and his card-shuffling bird.
A sombre mood passes over the audience as Keith's fortune is read out – portents of ill health, which is perhaps not that surprising given the unhappy relationship between Indian cuisine and delicate Western tummies.
The parrot is clearly fed up by the time Saskia sits down to have her future told, pulling out the second card in the deck before stomping back into its cage.
The card reveals Saskia's anxieties about her career, according to Ramesh's translation.
By this stage, the assembled crowd are sniggering and pointing fingers, while even Ramesh lets out a giggle.
“You were meant to be a man. He says you want to succeed like a man,” he explains.
Given the rapidly worsening predictions – from prosperity to gender bending – the rest of our party decides ignorance is bliss and save their rupees for a guy selling postcards.
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