Its name is The Loch, its location is in the heart of the highlands, and its four cosy, well-appointed rooms are called Argyle, Aberdeen, Arran and Ayr. It's enough to make a Scottish pro-independence voter shout, "Yes, yes, yes".
Except, sorry Jock, The Loch's not in Scotland at all — it's in the bucolic hills just outside of the historic Australian colonial village of Berrima, deep in the Southern Highlands of NSW, less than 90 minutes from Sydney. And, sorry again, but the food (sans haggis) is better than in Scotland, too.
The Loch, once horse stables, opened this year with a new floor added for the accommodation. It's the creation of Brigid Kennedy, owner of Simmer on the Bay, a major catering venue at Sydney's harbourside Walsh Bay, and her partner Kevin Nott.
Aside from the assured sense of idiosyncratic style and attention to detail in its rooms, spacious guests lounge and communal kitchen, the real key to The Loch is its new and canny weekly Farm Shop, held each Sunday.
It features not just edible goodies and produce, including preserves, farm-ranged meats and take-home meals, from trained chef Kennedy, but also antiques and offbeat vintage pieces collected, restored and refashioned by her partner Kevin.
They're all displayed by the horse-loving couple in the stalls left over from The Loch's former life. It feels like an equine IKEA (only better).
All in all, The Loch is set to be a popular new destination for foodie day trippers and house guests lucky enough to secure a room, och aye.
The Loch, 581 Greenhills Road, Berrima, NSW. Rooms start from $210, minimum two-night stay. See theloch.net.au