The world's worst airline slogans

Some airline slogans are bona fide classics – British Airways with "the world's favourite airline", Qantas with "the spirit of Australia", for example. Others? Well, they're not so good – and these are some of the dodgiest efforts.

Tajik Air

"National airline of Tajikistan"

Many of the worst slogans are phenomenally boring, and essentially just passion-free dictionary descriptions. Tajik Air goes absolutely straight down the line, without giving innovation a second thought. But it's not even a boast. It's not as if Tajikistan is particularly well known for its airlines, so being the national airline doesn't exactly bestow much kudos.

Lion Air

FILE - In this May 12, 2012 file photo, a Lion Air passenger jet is parked on the tarmac at Juanda International Airport in Surabaya, Indonesia. Indonesia's Lion Air said Monday, Oct. 29, 2018, it has lost contact with a passenger jet flying from Jakarta to an island off Sumatra. (AP Photo/Trisnadi, File)

Photo: AP

"We make you fly"

Given Lion Air's, ahem, enthusiasm-diminishing safety record, this is a motto that's probably ripe for changing. The element of compulsion about it is off-putting.

Malindo Air

Malindo Air Boeing 737 MAX.

"Smarter way to stay high"

Jeez – what are they putting in those in-flight cookies? Delightful though the idea of on-board bongs or cannabis diffused through the air conditioning system may be, we suspect whoever dreamed up this slogan for the Malaysian/ Indonesian airline wasn't entirely aware of the double meaning.

Advertisement

Solomon Airlines

Solomon Airlines Airbus A320-211 interior.

"Discover somewhere completely different"

We know what Solomon Airlines is trying to do here – suggest that it flies to unusual, off-the-beaten track destinations just ripe for exploring. Unfortunately, it comes across as though it'll fly you to somewhere completely different to the place you booked to go to. Fancy Bali? Well, tough, you're landing in Honiara.

Yeti Airlines

"You come first"

Fnarrrrrr. If this Nepalese airline doesn't realise it's fallen seriously foul of the double entendre police, it deserves to be bombarded with jokes about cockpits and getting wings. Still, as long as they keep it up when they've got a full load, does it really matter?

Air Tanzania

"The wings of Kilimanjaro"

No-one's doubting that Kilimanjaro's a good mountain – it's an exceptional mountain. An absolute worldie. But are planes and mountains such a good mix, guys? Do you really want to think about majestic, rugged peaks when you're taking off?

Maybe it means the mountain is flying? Which, frankly, doesn't sound all that aerodynamic.

Adria Airways

"Taking off to the future"

This Slovenian airline conjures up visions of being in one of those sci-fi movies where crew are put in cryogenic sleeping chambers as they travel light years from earth, then die one by one as the ship malfunctions/ the captain goes crazy and starts killing everyone/ a ruthless alien appears on board.

SyrianAir

Syrian Airlines SyrianAir

Photo: Shutterstock

"SyrianAir means safety"

This is a bit like saying KebabAir means healthy eating, or AngryChimpAir means quiet, reserved fellow passengers. Safety, alas, is not something people readily associate with Syria right now, and this slogan represents either sarcasm or extremely wishful thinking.

See also: World's safest, and least safe, airlines named in 2019 rankings

Druk Air

"On the wings of the dragon"

We've all seen Game Of Thrones, and while it's pretty impressive to see Daenerys riding Drogon, it doesn't look like the most comfortable experience in the world. They're a bit of a handful, too – and no-one wants to work that hard getting from A to B. Also, this Bhutanese airline should consider that the place to be seated on a flying dragon is on its back or neck. Sitting on the wings could seriously impede its flying capabilities.

Air Cote d'Ivoire

"Our best trip is you"

Er, what?

SpiceJet

"Red. Hot. Spicy"

This Indian airline seems to think it's advertising the sort of magazines usually found in opaque plastic covers at a rural petrol station. It might work for a truck-driver's one-handed reading material, but the idea of being boiling hot and panting for water is not so cool while flying across the country.

See also: Airline review: SpiceJet economy class

LOT Polish Airlines

A pedestrian walks past the LOT Polish Airlines SA ticket and customer services desk at Warsaw Chopin airport in Warsaw, Poland, on Saturday, Aug. 29, 2015. Polish national airline LOT has lost its chief executive officer as the government debates whether to sell part of the company to an outside investor. Photographer: Piotr Malecki/Bloomberg Poland

Photo: Bloomberg

"You choose the direction"

If we're being honest, we'd rather the pilot did.

See also: Airline review: LOT Polish Airlines economy class

Air Europe

"You still have a choice"

Despite sounding like a desperate plea, this one did make vague sense at the time. British Airways had just taken over British Caledonian – which promoted itself with "you never forget you have a choice" – and this was a sly dig at the perceived monopoly. Passengers exercised their choice, though – and Air Europe ceased operations in 1991.

Continental

"We really move our tails for you"

When Continental tried this one out in 1974, it pretended that it was a reference to its previous slogan – "Proud birds with the golden tails". Understandably, flight attendants weren't overly delighted with this, and after protests that it was demeaning sexism, the slogan was quickly dropped.

Air Jamaica

"Feel it when you fly!"

The idea was probably that you feel the Jamaican spirit – get a touch of reggae fever or something. But that's probably not spelt out quite well enough. Given that Air Jamaica ceased operations in 2015, it seems other passengers might have been thinking of brutally uncomfortable seats and turbulence, too ...

See also: Ten of the best budget airlines you've probably never heard of

See also: What the F? Cathay spells its own name wrong on plane

Comments